Frank Zappa - Cosmic Debris

THE MYSTERY MAN CAME OVER
AND HE SAID: "I'M OUTTA SITE!"
HE SAID FOR A NOMINAL SERVICE CHARGE
I COULD REACH NER-VONNA TONITE
IF I WAS READY, WILLING, AND ABLE
TO PAY HIM HIS REGULAR FEE
HE WOULD DROP ALL THE REST
OF HIS PRESSING AFFAIRS
AND DEVOTE HIS ATTENTION TO ME
BUT I SAID

LOOK HERE, BROTHER
WHO YOU JIVIN' WITH THAT
COSMIK DEBRIS?
LOOK HERE, BROTHER
DON'T YOU WASTE YOUR TIME
ON ME

WELL, THE MYSTERY MAN GOT NERVOUS
AN' HE FIDGET AROUND A BIT
HE REACHED IN THE POCKET OF HIS MYSTERY ROBE
AN' HE WHIPPED OUT A SHAVING KIT
NOW, I THOUGHT IT WAS A RAZOR
AND A CAN OF FOAMIN' GOO
BUT HE TOLD ME RIGHT THEN
WHEN THE TOP POPPED OPEN
THERE WAS NOTHIN' HIS BOX WON'T DO
WITH THE OIL OF AFRO DYTEE
AN' THE DUST OF THE GRAND WAZOO
HE SAID: "YOU MIGHT NOT BELIEVE THIS, LITTLE FELLA
BUT IT'LL CURE YOUR ASTHMA TOO!"
AN' I SAID

LOOK HERE, BROTHER
WHO YOU JIVIN' WITH THAT
COSMIK DEBRIS?
(WHAT KIND OF A GURU ARE YOU, ANYWAY?)
LOOK HERE, BROTHER
DON'T YOU WASTE YOUR TIME
ON ME

I'VE GOT TROUBLES OF MY OWN, I SAID
AND YOU CAN'T HELP ME OUT
SO TAKE YOUR MEDITATIONS AND RAM IT UP YOUR SNOUT
"BUT I GOT A KRISTL BOLE!" HE SAID
AN' HELD IT TO THE LIGHT
SO I SNATCHED IT ALL AWAY FROM HIM
AN' I SHOWED HIM HOW TO
DO IT RIGHT

I WRAPPED A NEWSPAPER 'ROUND MY HEAD
SO I LOOKED LIKE I WAS DEEP
I SAID SOME MUMBO-JUMBOS THEN,
'N TOLD HIM HE WAS GOING TO SLEEP

I ROBBED HIS RINGS AN' POCKET WATCH
AN' EVERYTHING ELSE I FOUND
I HAD THAT SUCKER HYPNOTIZED
HE COULDN'T EVEN MAKE A SOUND

I PROCEEDED TO TELL HIM HIS FUTURE THEN
AS LONG AS HE WAS HANGIN' AROUND
I SAID "THE PRICE OF MEAT HAS JUST GONE UP
AN' YOUR OLD LADY HAS JUST GONE DOWN!"

LOOK HERE, BROTHER
WHO YOU JIVIN' WITH THAT COSMIK DEBRIS?
LOOK HERE BROTHER
DON'T YOU WASTE YOUR TIME
ON ME
NOW IS THAT A REAL PONCHO
OR IS THAT A SEARS PONCHO...
DON'T YOU KNOW, YOU COULD MAKE
MORE MONEY AS A BUTCHER? AND SO-
DON'T YOU WASTE YOUR TIME
ON ME!
OM SHANTI
OM SHANTI