Frank Zappa - Dumb All Over

WHOEVER WE ARE,
WHEREVER WE'RE FROM,
WE SHOULDA NOTICED BY NOW
OUR BEHAVIOR IS DUMB,
AND IF OUR CHANCES
EXPECT TO IMPROVE,
IT'S GONNA TAKE A LOT MORE
THAN TRYIN' TO REMOVE
'THE OTHER RACE'
(OR THE OTHER 'WHATEVER')
FROM THE FACE OF THE PLANET
ALL TOGETHER

NOW THEY CALL IT THE EARTH
(WHICH IS A DUMB KINDA NAME),
BUT THEY NAMED IT RIGHT,
'CAUSE WE BEHAVE THE SAME:
WE ARE DUMB ALL OVER!

DUMB ALL OVER,
YES WE ARE!
DUMB ALL OVER,
NEAR 'N FAR!
DUMB ALL OVER,
(BLACK & WHITE)
PEOPLE, WE IS NOT WRAPPED TIGHT!

NURDS ON THE LEFT!
NURDS ON THE RIGHT!
RELIGIOUS FANATICS
ON THE AIR EVERY NIGHT,
SAYIN': "THE BIBLE TELLS THE STORY!"
(MAKES THE DETAILS SOUND REAL GORY)
'BOUT WHAT TO DO
IF THE "GEEKS OVER THERE"
DON'T BELIEVE IN THE BOOK
WE GOT OVER HERE!

YOU CAN'T RUN A RACE
WITHOUT NO FEET,
'N PRETTY SOON
THERE WON'T BE ON STREET
FOR DUMMIES TO JOG ON,
OR DOGGIES TO DOG ON--
(RELIGIOUS FANATICS
CAN MAKE IT BE ALL GONE--
IT WON'T BLOW UP 'N DISAPPEAR,
IT'LL JUST LOOK UGLY FOR A THOUSAND YEARS!)

YOU CAN'T RUN A COUNTRY
BY A BOOK OF RELIGION!
NOT BY A HEAP, OR A LUMP,
OR A SMIDGEON
OF FOOLISH RULES OF ANCIENT DATE,
DESIGNED TO MAKE YOU ALL FEEL GREAT,
WHILE YOU FOLD, SPINDLE, AND MUTILATE
THOSE UNBELIEVERS FROM A NEIGHBORING STATE

"TO ARMS! TO ARMS!"
HOORAY! THAT'S GREAT
(TWO LEGS AIN'T BAD, UNLESS THERE'S A CRATE
THEY SHIP THE PARTS TO MAMA IN)

FOR SOUVENIRS: TWO EARS
(GET DOWN!)
NOT HIS, NOT HERS (BUT WHAT-THE-HEY?)
THE GOOD BOOK SAYS: "IT GOTTA BE THAT WAY!"
BUT THEIR BOOK SAYS: "REVENGE THE CRUSADES"
(WITH WHIPS 'N CHAINS 'N HAND GRENADES)

TWO ARMS? TWO ARMS?
HAVE ANOTHER AND ANOTHER!
OUR GOD SAYS: "THERE AIN'T NO OTHER!"
OUR GOD SAYS: "IT'S ALL OKAY!"
OUR GOD SAYS: "THIS IS THE WAY!"

IT SAYS IN THE BOOK:
"BURN AND DESTROY! REPENT, 'N REDEEM 'N REVENGE, 'N DEPLOY
'N RUMBLE THEE FORTH,TO THE LAND OF THE UNBELIEVING SCUM ON THE OTHER SIDE!"
('CAUSE THEY DON'T GO FOR WHAT'S IN THE BOOK, 'N THAT MAKES 'EM BAD!)

SO, VERILY, WE MUST CHOPPETH THEM UP
AND STOMPETH THEM DOWN
(OR RENT A NICE FRENCH BOMB TO POOF THEM OUT OF EXISTANCE--
WHILE LEAVING THEIR REAL ESTATE JUST WHERE WE NEED IT,
TO USE AGAIN (FOR TEMPLES
IN WHICH TO PRAISE OUR GOD,
'CAUSE HE CAN REALLY TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS!)

AND WHEN HIS HUMBLE TV SERVANT,
WITH HUMBLE WHITE HAIR, AND HUMBLE GLASSES, AND A NICE BROWN SUIT,
(AND MAYBE A BLOND WIFE WHO TAKES PHONE CALLS)

TELLS US OUR GOD SAYS "IT'S OKAY TO DO THIS STUFF"
THEN WE GOTTA DO IT-- 'CAUSE IF WE DON'T
WE AIN'T "GWINE UP TO HEBBIN!!"
(DEPENDING ON WHICH BOOK YOU'RE USING AT THE TIME;
"CAN'T USE THEIRS! IT DON'T WORK! IT'S ALL LIES! GOTTA USE MINE")

AIN'T THAT RIGHT?
THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY!
EVERY NIGHT!
EVERY DAY!
HEY, WE CAN'T REALLY BE DUMB IF WE'RE JUST FOLLOWING GOD'S ORDERS
LET'S GET SERIOUS! HE KNOWS WHAT HE'S DOIN'! HE WROTE THIS BOOK HERE,
'N THE BOOK SAYS: "HE MADE US ALL TO BE JUST LIKE HIM," SO...
IF WE'RE DUMB, THEN GOD IS DUMB,
('N MAYBE EVEN A LITTLE BIT UGLY ON THE SIDE)