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She climbs a tree and scrapes her knee Her dress has got a tear She waltzes on her way to Mass And whistles on the stair And underneath her wimple She has curlers in her hair I even heard her singing in the abbey She`s always late for chapel But her penitence is real She`s always late for everything Except for every meal I hate to have to say it But I very firmly feel Maria`s not an asset to the abbey I`d like to say a word in her behalf Maria makes me laugh How do you solve a problem like Maria? How do you catch a cloud and pin it down? How do you find a word that means Maria? A flibbertijibbet! A will-o`-the wisp! A clown! Many a thing you know you`d like to tell her Many a thing she ought to understand But how do you make her stay And listen to all you say How do you keep a wave upon the sand Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria? How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand? When I`m with her I`m confused Out of focus and bemused And I never know exactly where I am Unpredictable as weather She`s as flighty as a feather She`s a darling! She`s a demon! She`s a lamb! She`d outpester any pest Drive a hornet from its nest She could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl She is gentle! She is wild! She`s a riddle! She`s a child! She`s a headache! She`s an angel! She`s a girl! How do you solve a problem like Maria? How do you catch a cloud and pin it down? How do you find a word that means Maria? A flibbertijibbet! A will-o`-the wisp! A clown! Many a thing you know you`d like to tell her Many a thing she ought to understand But how do you make her stay And listen to all you say How do you keep a wave upon the sand Oh, how do you solve a problem like Maria? How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?
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