From First To Last - Note To Self

Two roads split off from here
And my life goes running
In opposite directions
Exaggerating the barrier between
Who I am and who I want to be

I wanted to be that breath of fresh air
When everything smelled so insincere
But its taste still lingers in my mouth
Deceit has ways of sticking around
When I'm ready to disappear
Vacation seems far from here Note to self: I miss you terribly
This is what we call a tragedy
Come back to me, come back to me, to me ...

I can feel my mind wondering again
Into where I don't know
And will I ever get home?
Time starts moving, faster than I can
I'm getting sick of this scene
I need to break the routine

Which part of me is lost?
I feel so close, and yet I am so far